Do you really know your inner critic?

It's highly likely you have an inner critic and this can get worse as anxiety climbs in perimenopause. Especially with so many body changes going on and mood swings the may mean regrettable outbursts. 

If you didn't you wouldn't be human. Even a monk who is practiced in the art of contemplation and meditation, still has an inner critic. 

It's common to hear terms relating to coaching and therapy such as "how to silence your inner critic!".  To me this sounds much how you would silence a child. 

"I don't like what you have to say so be quiet" or

"I haven't got time for you right now, go away"

"What you have to say isn't relevant"

"That look really doesn't suit you"

"you're taking up too much space"

There are even visualisations where you don't let your inner critic into the party you are having! 

Read those phrases again. Notice how that feels. What's happening in your body?  Do you feel a tightness?  Do you feel angry?  Sad? Rejected? 

If you feel any of the above, or something else, that is because the inner critic in you is a part of you. Perhaps you felt nothing at all in which case, it can be helpful to notice your inner critic over the next week, and the phrases that trigger you. 

It's the part of you that has been rejected, put down, not been heard and yes told to shut up, often as a child. 

There are several ways that you can work with your inner-critic not reject them AGAIN. 

First.  Give your inner critic a name, an outfit, offer them a drink.  Notice what the drink is - we'll come to that in the end of this blog. 

Second ask them what they need? Or what they think you need. Perhaps let off some steam, are you able to have a conversation with them? Maybe give them a hug. They might just need to curl up in a chair and watch the party - that may be enough. 

Third. Always remember that your inner critic is just reflecting back the thoughtless, dismissive, or maybe even cruel comments that have been thrown to you by other people. Their energy is driven by the power other people have taken from you. 

Take your power back, by learning to love your inner critic, Getting to know them.  

Acknowledge them, but turn every word into power by having compassion for those words. Recognise that behind those words is a hurt child or teenager. If you have been bullied and abused by a partner, or a boss, that inner critic can also take root, causing you to doubt yourself. 

Hypnosis is a superb tool for helping you to unconsciously recognise your inner critic and adapt your relationship. In this way your inner critic can be a reminder that you are taking your power back, and to learn how to speak to yourself with kindness, love and acceptance. 

So why not give your inner critic a hug today, and tell them that you see them, that you hear them and that you are letting go of the past and moving forward into your power.